Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
