We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
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