How'd it feel making her break her religion?
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
