Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
