doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
