Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
