So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
