Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Randomize
