She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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