My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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