I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Randomize
