Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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