Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize