who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
