Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
