I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize