So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
