I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
im having a threesome with these popsicles
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
