hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize