I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
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