Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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