Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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