I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Randomize
