i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
The ass gains better be worth it
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