I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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