I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
