i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Randomize
