Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
You left your phone here
Wait...
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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