we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
