note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize