So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize