we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
