Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
