dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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