sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
