I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Randomize
