Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
