Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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