im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
