i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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