I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
