The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
