I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize