i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
