How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
