i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
