She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
where does the pee come out of this thing
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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