Can i not drive my cunt home
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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