fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
