Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Randomize
